February 28, 2005

Strange Dream

This nocturnal surrealistic drama lasted for what seemed like hours. I owned an old 1991 Carravan, a 1975 Nova with a sprung unibody suspension, a 1968 Corvette (red, of course) and an '88 Audi 5k. All of them were parked around a one block radius.
The Audi is the only one I actually own although I used to have a '75 Nova with a tracking problem a long time ago.
The dream consisted of my moving stuff from the minivan to the other vehicles. And this stuff consisted of everything from guitars and clothing to moldy bags of old potato peelings. Obviously, I would want to fit it all into the 'vette, but, given the small storage possibilities in that car, it wouldn't all fit. The other autos were used for staging areas and I carried bag after bag of crap from one to the other.
I woke up exhausted.
I assume this means that I want to move my life around. Looking deeper, I guess this also concerns leaving a more materialistic life behind since the detrius of my life wouldn't all fit into the most expensive vehicle in the sequence.
I don't know what I eventually ended up doing. The alarm clock tends to forestall climactic endings and there is hardly ever a sequel.
What I find most strange, though, is that I actually remembered this dream. I hardly ever do that....so why this one?
Maybe someone is just going to give me a Corvette today....

February 25, 2005


A good time waster: http://www.birdcheck.co.uk/whackthepenguin.htm

Song running endlessly through my head: Seasons in the Sun (aaaaaauuuuggghhh!!!!)

Song I wish was running endlessly through my head: Great Gig in the Sky

Task today: retain attorney and completely rebuild/reconfigure an email server on a new dsl connection.

Feeling like: a half peeled overly ripe bannana

February 24, 2005

taking the longer road
to arrive
is not how this was envisioned nor,
how it feels comfortable.
achieving culmination
makes the difficult journey possible.

February 23, 2005

Can't sleep redux

Awake at 3 for no apparent reason.
Intruders? Fire? Cat jumping on my head?
None of these....just aware again.
So, might as well make an attempt to be productive.
Put on the coffee.
Let's see....too early to do laundry and running the vacuum is out (neighbors would rightly complain). Likewise with plugging in the guitar.
So I will sit and sort paperwork - it has needed to get done for a long time: my piles have their own piles now.
But first I will read some blogs and the forum.
And then I will write here.
I think the coffee is done now.
But I really want to just crawl back into bed. So I make it instead thinking that the smooth surface cover will remove the temptation. And, to my mild astonishment, it works.
My thoughts have, by now, realized that I am up and vulnerable once again to their attack. So motivation (the little coward) creeps back into its cubby hole waiting for the day that I can once again fully utilize it.
And the paper landscape strewn around my desk chair will be allowed to form its own terrain for yet another day.
Early mornings are great - quiet, calm, peaceful...no phones ringing, no demands....only me. Ohhhh....there lies the problem. I get it now.
The coffee sucks.

February 22, 2005

I love this site:

Just feed it an unsuspecting url and Snoop Dogg will translate into something only he can understand.
I have to find Falwell's site and translate....
I am easily amused, I guess ('n shit)...

Can I really publish via email?

Well, if this shows up on the blog, then I can.
If it doesn't, then you won't know anyway....

Last time I tried this, it failed miserably, but we'll see...we'll see....

February 21, 2005

WooHoo! My kid is sick!

Not that I really wish this on her or anything, but it provides the proof that I didn't have food poisoning over the weekend.
And I was worried that I would never be able to drink another Spotted Cow ever again.
I am happy, yet dismayed all at the same time.
Time to go change the bucket.....

February 19, 2005

Food poisoning

Suffice it to say: blarghushilianism

Don't know if it was the fish fry, the cole slaw or the slightly weird tasting second Spotted Cow last night, but holy shit (not even meant literally)!
Starting to feel better now, but that's just cause I haven't eaten anything all day, I believe.
I love porcelain!

February 17, 2005

buy stock in eye drops

My co-worker is on vacation (Mexico, no less), so I have had to quickly pick up some of the things he does while here.
He deserves a raise so that he can pay his eye-care bill. My vision is strained intensely now; the eyes are dry yet blurry.
He edits cobbled up source for web presentation as a part of his duties and this is the portion that fell into my lap. I have shallow troughs vertically on my face now from the tracks the generic drops have made. If I had been thinking, I would have just carved canals into my cheekbones to allow for drainage so as to alleviate the need for 64 boxes of tissues.
Hmmm...a new invention....a stainless steel rig that holds bottles of faux tears connected to a timer that will blast the optical centers of your face every 2 minutes or so. Efficient. Streamlined. Could also be used for mild torture, if you happen to be listening Mr. Gonzales...

Can't sleep

jimmy kimmel sucks
infomercials will shortly take over
and i can't watch another one for shit i don't need
or can afford

i'd like to say that i toss and turn but i don't
i just lay there with thoughts spinning endlessly so that
i do not even try.

i try to communicate throughout the day but it doesn't get through
or, at least, i don't perceive it as being accepted.
instead, the solitary syllabalic answer must needs suffice.
so i hang on those single words and attempt to glean meaning.
failure is apparent after midnight.

negativity? probably.
stress? definitely.
questions? lots.
answers? none.

i don't know where i'm going
and i don't know where i've been
and i used to love the future
but the past reminds
so that hope, rather than springing eternal, rests for the nonce.

February 16, 2005

The fatigue is starting....

Okay, with this new blog, I am setting a threshold that I cannot possibly maintain. Two posts a day so far? Previously, I was lucky to post once every two months.
Is the motivation better somehow? Has the rambling resurrected itself? Has written verbosity taken over?
I don't have any idea. But I know that I cannot keep this up....my brain will certainly explode next Thursday at 9:21 if I try.

On another note, why is it that as I read other blogs, the spelling is so atrocious? Don't these folk know that there is a spell check available here?

I hate packing lunches...

Now that I work downtown, I find that it is not only more efficient but also substantially less expensive to pack a lunch than to find sustenance downtown.
I'm all for supporting local business, but when choices are $5 for a bowl of soup or $7.50 for a grilled ham and cheese (even if it includes chips), packing a lunch for $1.25 seems the better choice.
However, home fixings are usually lacking in variety unless I have had the foresight to stock up on pita/hummus/etc.
I can see why peanut butter and banana came to be: out of desperation for variety, somebody made the leap.
I've tried the thermos of chili but that entails heating it up first thing in the morning which, at least on some mornings, is the last thing I want to be doing.
I've tried the bread, cheese and sausage route which is fine when canoeing but loses some of its luster when eaten at the desk.
Could I use one of the microwaves here to heat up leftovers or a pre-packaged frozen something? Sure I could. Of course, you've not checked on the state of public microwave ovens lately have you? Would you place anything edible in something in this:

Yuck Posted by Hello

So, I will continue to be bored at noon and, hopefully, can make up for it with culinary excellence during the dinner hour.

February 15, 2005

I feel proud and old all at the same times

Tonight marked the night my daughter voted for the first time. It was a local referendum, but she is now registered and ready to go for the future.
What is really great is that she was the one who wanted to vote.....she felt strongly enough about the meager local issues to make it important for her to go cast the ballot.
So, I am old since I have a kid who is voting age.
But at least I feel like I have imparted at least some sort of social responsibility into her psyche.

I want an Easy Button....

The commercials where people have a button to push in order to overcome a difficult task resonates with most of us, I think. How nice it would be.
My desires for this new cutting edge technology goes further, however; I want one to be able to deal with emotional issues, fiscal problems and traumatic situations.
Is that too much to ask? I mean really - technology companies are commercially cloning cats for $50k each, so why not this?
Truth be told, I would settle for a 'Comatose Pill' instead on some days....
I can always fall back on the idea that going through mental hell is 'character building', but I think (and most who know me would agree) that I'm already enough of a character and don't need a continuing education program.